We Are All Messy... Forgiveness, Shame & Freedom

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of Life set me free from the law of sin and death."  Romans 8:1-2

"With the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved.  Those who enter into Christ's being here for us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black cloud.  A new power is in operation.  The Spirit of Life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death."
Romans 8:1-2  the Message

I was recently watching an interview with Momastery founder and author of "Carry On Warrior", Glennon Doyle Melton and she related a story that reached out and hit me between the eyes.  Now, you have to realize that she is completely open about her "mess."  Really, she has bravely put it all out there,  battles with addiction, depression, and more.  And she's honest about how the freedom and forgiveness she found in Jesus has transformed her life.  Anyway, she is talking about how she received a review of her book from a person, and that person expressed disbelief that Glennon didn't express more remorse over her having an abortion. I believe what was was said was, "How can she have so little shame about her abortion?"  Her response is one that hit me.  She said that when she read the Bible, and it said that even though she was a person who screwed up the first part of her life, that God forgave her and could use her, and use all of her mess for good,  she believed it.

Which brings me back up to the scriptures written above.  They were written by Paul-- a man who truly had a grasp on God's forgiveness and what it meant for him, and for others.  And yes, Paul was one of the greatest influences in the early church.  He is responsible for a large chunk of the books found in the New Testament.  But Paul, was at one point known as Saul-- a man who enacted great violence on those who followed Christ.  He was a murderer of Christians. Men and women.  He had no pity on them.  Surely, he should express and carry great shame.  Surely he could not be used to promote the church with his background.  Yes, his name was changed, but people still knew who he was.  What he had done in the past.  All the horrible details of it.

And, his shame could have kept him from stepping out and doing anything.  He could have spent the rest of his life ducking his head, carrying a great burden.  But, you see, Paul truly grasped what Jesus had done for him.  He believed what God said.  He believed it when Jesus told him he was forgiven, and not only forgiven, but that  he was going to be greatly used to share the words of Jesus.  And I have yet to find an account where he tried to sanitize his past.  In fact, I think the power of his testimony lay in the mess of his past life.  He didn't let his "mess" immobilize him and he didn't try to hide it or put on pretense because of it.

So, what do you believe?  Do you really believe in forgiveness, grace, redemption?  Really?  Do you really believe in the freedom from shame and sin?  Or, do you think that, even once we are forgiven, we should walk around carrying the burden of shame?

There's a second part to this Paul story that I want to point out.  It's found in Acts 9:26-28.  It's the account of when Paul, after being forgiven and transformed, tried to join the disciples.

"Back in Jerusalem he tried to join the disciples, but they were all afraid of him.  They didn't trust him.  Then Barnabas took him under his wing.  He introduced him to the apostles and stood up for him, told them how Saul had seen and spoken to the Master on the Damascus Road, and how in Damascus itself he had laid his life on the line with his bold preaching in Jesus name.  After that he was accepted as one of them."

Now, I can't say that I don't understand the disciples reaction just a little bit.  I mean really, Saul's reputation was scary.  But here's what I want you to see. Barnabas believed as well.  Barnabas believed in Jesus' ability to forgive and transform Paul.  Not only did he take Paul under his wing-- it says he introduced him to the others.  I don't believe that when Barnabas introduced Paul, that he did it meekly, or with some shame of who Paul was.  It says he stood up for Paul.

I personally am tired of churches where everyone walks in with a mask.  I'm tired of sanitized church. A place where the ugliness and messiness of life is not acknowledged or allowed.  It's not real.  It doesn't allow others to be real.  It's about recognizing the real life mess that we all bring in.  You shouldn't have to sanitize your story.  You shouldn't have to wear a mask.  You should be able to stand, in the middle of your messy life, and praise God for the forgiveness, grace, and renewal that He is doing/has done in your life.  You should be able to walk in your faith without dragging this big load of shame and guilt behind you.   Following Christ means freedom from that baggage.  What attracted people to Christ is the fact that he never denied the messiness of life. In fact, he met them, right in the middle of their mess, and brought them a freedom that no one else could.

If you are out there, buried under what seems to be a mountain of shame and guilt, I am telling you to hand it over to the one who can remove the mountain.  Give it to God.  Let Him bring you freedom.  Messiness doesn't scare God.  He knows you-- the real you--the you beneath all of the dirt and clutter.  And He calls you beloved.  Even if the only thing you can do is throw up one hand and cry help, He will hear you.  Let him take your hand and lift you out of the rubble.  And then, when you are free, do not let anyone burden you by throwing the rubble back onto your shoulders.  Believe that God can and will forgive you.  Believe that God can and will use you, and your mess, for good.

My goal is to always remember with great joy that forgiveness, grace, and freedom from shame is the real gift that Jesus brought into this world.  And I am going to practice being Paul and Barnabas.  I am going to practice living with and believing in that gift, and then I am also going to practice being a "Barnabas" to those around me.  I am going to practice being real.  Being authentic.  And being free.

I'll leave you with a few sunrise photos from the other day.

"This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life.  It's adventurously expectant, greeting God with a childlike, 'What's next, Papa?'  Gods spirit touches our spirits and confirms who we really are."  Romans 8:15-16  the Message

A return to Laughter, Fun & Joy... or Who's Your Momma Now?

We have been way too serious around our house lately.  Waaaaaayyyyyy to serious!  We've had serious conversations about college, and grades, and chores, and work.....  And don't get me wrong, these are important conversations to have, but I looked up the other day and thought,   hmmmmm are we having any fun?  And I decided that the answer was not nearly enough fun was being "had" at Casa Benintendi... so I set out to rectify this situation.


Jeff called and said that Jeanne Robertson was speaking at a local charity/fundraising dinner, would we be interested in going?  Ummmmmmm.... yes!  She's so funny and it was for a good cause so it was a win/win.  We were lucky enough to have a table up front, and so she picked on Keagan quite a bit, which he enjoyed-- he loves a good laugh.

But, as you know, one night does not a fun life make.  And so, I have taken it upon myself to have a little fun at home.  And my sight focused upon our 16 year old son.  I went out to a local store and purchased some "fake snow."  The kind that is made up of millions of tiny, round, styrofoam beads.  The great thing about styrofoam is that it generates an immense amount of static electricity, which causes it to stick to anything with relentless fervor.  Ha!  Perfect!  I had the annoying sticking fake snow and Keagan has a car ;)  I waited until Keagan had gone to bed (Jeff was out of town on business, so no partner in crime on this one).  Then I went down to his car and dumped several bags of the fake snow into his defrost vents and set said vents on high, so that when he started his car in the morning, they would blow the fake snow all over his car.

The next morning, I prayed with him before he walked out the door and then sat back and waited.  It didn't take long.  He came marching back to the front door, little balls of fake styrofoam snow clinging to him from head to toe.  He was not laughing.  When I met him at the door he simply said, "You are going to help me clean this up right?"  I looked at him, standing there, somewhat indignant, and watched as the beads of fake snow clung to his hair, clothing, and eyebrows..... and I laughed.  Great big belly laughs.  I laughed until I cried.  I laughed so hard that I forgot to take a photo.

He stood there, blinking at me, fake snow clinging to the end of his nose, and then in typical teenaged fashion said, "Whatever.  I'm going to school."  And marched back to his car.  And 7 days later, I'm still laughing ( and he is laughing also, now).

A few days later, Keagan invited some of his friends over for the last swim party of the year before we close the pool for the winter.  Let me tell you nothing is funnier than listening to teenage boys goofing around in the pool.  They are funny!  Seriously, roll on the floor laughing, funny!  

Next came Rupert, the seriously creepy fake Rat.  He's been making the rounds, showing up where you least expect him,  like in Keagan's sock drawer.  ;)  Oh, and he squeaks when you pick him up.  The cat's scared of him....

"Laughter has tremendous beauty and lightness."

And we have been laughing, and having fun, and just in general enjoying life.  And it's good.  God is good.  And we are remembering to not take ourselves so seriously.  And, just when you think the laughter and pranks are over.....

Yup, that's Keagan's Jeep, covered in Saran Wrap.  Lots and lots and lots of Saran Wrap.  Everywhere.  This time I had a partner in crime in the form of Jeff.  And while Keagan was not initially amused (he's a little cranky in the mornings), Jeff and I enjoyed a good laugh all day.  And Keagan eventually joined in, later.

"Always find a reason to laugh.  It may not add years to your life, but it will surely add life to your years."

So, if you are finding yourself being a little too serious these days, I encourage you to look for reasons to laugh, or at least for reasons to smile.  Have a great day!

Letting Go ... The Complex Dance of Parenthood

Music plays a big role in our house.  We are a house of music lovers, and our tastes are wide and diverse.  I often put on music when I'm cooking dinner, and sometimes this turns into mini dance parties.  I remember the times when Keagan was little and I would stop what I was doing and pick him up and dance around with him.  As he got older,  he would place his little feet on top of mine and off we would go.....laughing and singing....Good memories.

And I would compare this art of parenthood as a complex dance, a dance of slowly letting go.  It starts from the minute you bring a baby home.  You immediately start on the letting go process by letting your baby self sooth sometimes.  Or, letting them fall asleep on their own without being held.  And it progresses to letting them become more and more independent as they start to become mobile. All of this is an important step in their development, but it requires us as parents to relinquish our hold on them, more and more.

This complex dance requires you, as a parent, to listen for the rhythms that tell you how fast or slow to let go.  Sometimes, you are picking your child up and showing that child how to do the dance of life in your arms.  Sometimes you are letting your children stand on top of your feet so that they can follow your footsteps.

And then there are times when you have to let them lead the dance.  This is often the most painful part.  They will often step painfully on your toes.  And sometimes you will step painfully on theirs.

Sometimes they will want to dance to a different rhythm.  Those times when you are wanting them to Waltz and instead they want to do the Quick Step. In your effort to slow them down and in their effort to speed you up, you may find yourself doing a sort of funny Foxtrot mixture of slow and quick steps.

The dance of Letting Go will sometimes leave you exhausted.  You will find yourself winded due to the change in rhythm, the complexity of the steps, and the general length of the dance.  At other times, the times when you feel like the dance was done in perfect synchronized elegance, you will feel elated and proud.

But the main goal of this dance still remains the same.  You are preparing your young one to eventually dance with other partners.  You slowly abdicate your role as sole dance partner.  And you worry.  Did I teach my child to listen to the right rhythm?  Did I teach my child to take the lead in his or her own dance of life?  Does my child have enough knowledge about the different styles of dance? Are they a good dancer?

What is interesting about this dance called parenthood is that throughout your child's life, they will come back to you to learn how to do a different dance step.  This dance of Letting Go is also a dance of recurring dance lessons.

And the best part, is that if you manage to get through the first part of the Letting God dance, at some point you will once again be selected by your child as their dance partner, only this time, they may be leading the dance.  There's nothing more beautiful than when your child willing chooses you as their partner for a dance.

So don't give up if your dance is a little chaotic right now.  Dancing well takes practice, lots of it.  And it's okay if you sometimes get the steps messed up, or somehow get off rhythm.  When those times happen, take a water break, breathe, and then jump right back in.  Even if you do not think your child is listening to you, even if you are doubtful that your child will ever be able to dance, let alone, take the lead.  This thing called muscle memory is amazing.  This particular muscle will involve the brain-- plant deep seeds of dance knowledge there, and at  the most amazing times, your child will remember it.

"Train up a child in the way he should go;  even when he is old he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:6

So, I would say to myself and to you, keep up the dance, don't stop!  It's important!  And don't forget to sometimes just lose yourself in the dance-- take the time to enjoy it.  The art of dancing well is to truly give yourself to the rhythm and beauty of the movement, to be fully in the moment, to synchronize with another in shared joy.  Teach your children the slow dances, show them that there is beauty there.  Teach them the fast, joyous dances and show them the laughter that is there. Teach them that it is ok to sometimes mix the steps together to create a new and unique dance, there is contentment to be found in creativity.  And, when they mess up, when the trip or stumble, or step on their partners toes, teach them to stop, take a breath, and start the dance again.  In the end, the dance you create with your child will be unique.  Teach them to the best of your ability and let them go, so that they can lead their own dance.

I'll leave you with a few fall photo's from around my house.  Right now, I am enjoying the way the leaves dance in the wind as they fall to the ground.

A Hopeful Southern Pine

When out walking the other morning I came upon this little pine sapling, and thought to myself, that's a hopeful little tree. 

Now I've got to give you some background on the pine trees that grow here around my house in order for you to understand the above statement.  I'm a Colorado girl.  I grew up where the pine trees grow tall, with thick branches dense with pine needles and large, deeply rooted tree trunks.

Where I currently live we have what are called Southern Pine.  They also grow very tall, but that is where their similarity to their western cousins ends.  Southern Pine trunks stay thin, almost spindly.  And they tend to only grow branches and needles at the very top of the tree.  The other interesting thing is that their roots do not grow very deep, and thus they have a tendency to just suddenly topple over after a good rainfall.  In fact, when I was speaking to a guy we had hired to take down some trees on our property, he mentioned that you never want to leave/have just one Southern Pine standing on it's own. You see, the Southern Pine trees do best when they grow  with other Southern Pine trees around them. Apparently their root systems combine underground and make them more stable, less susceptible to tipping over.  Hmmmm... the things you learn from people... it's fascinating.

Sidebar:  I could tell you about the time, while missing my home state, I tried planting a Colorado Blue Spruce behind my house.  You know, the ones that grow well in the dry, high Mountain atmosphere that is Colorado.  This poor tree, which I planted in the rainy season (translate: all year long in this neck of the woods)  didn't know what to do with all this moisture.  Needless to say, this tree was out of its element and eventually all the needles turned brown and then dropped off.  To top it off, apparently the White Tail Deer had never run across this particular delicacy and they promptly ate what was left of said poor tree clear down to the ground.  I'm sure there's a metaphorical story in this somewhere, but we do not have the time right now.

So, back to this hopeful little pine tree.  I call it hopeful, because if you notice, it's not even anchored into the ground.  Instead, it is growing straight up out of a rotting tree that had previously fallen down. Not a great anchor for times of stormy weather.  The other reason I call it hopeful is because there are no other Southern Pine trees growing around it. Yet, here it is, growing.  In an unlikely place.  Hopeful.

I ran across this second hopeful tree while on the same walk.  It's an Oak Tree.  What struck me is that, although it was barely bigger than a sapling, it's leaves were prolific.  When I went home to look up the type/name of this Oak I discovered that it is a Bluff Oak.  This species was almost eradicated because of it's popularity during the 1800's for casket building.  Hmmmm.... a hopeful little tree indeed.  They are considered somewhat rare, and yet here one was, growing wild near my home.  In an unlikely place.  Hopeful.

Hope is an interesting thing.  It often shows up in the most unlikely of places, at the most unlikely times.  The Bible is filled with stories of Hope in unlikely times and in unlikely places.  I like to call them the "But God" moments.  

The first of these moments is when Joseph is reunited with his brothers (the same brothers who let their jealousy cause them to sell him into slavery).  Joseph makes the following statement: "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives."  Genesis 50:20

And Psalms 73: 26 says this:  "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

There are many more, too numerous to mention.  But here's what I really want to say to you about hope today.  For those of you, my dear ones, who are hurting and suffering today.  For those who have sat in my home this past year and bravely shared with me your stories of loss, and despair, and despondency,  there is a hope for you.  To my friend who shared with me her sorrow at losing a family member even though is was "expected."  For my friend who shared with me his loss of a family member that was so "unexpected."  Expected or unexpected, loss is loss.  To my friend who has suffered recent loss, and to my friend whose loss was a past one.  There is no time limit on grief.  Some cuts become scars, and although they heal over a little bit, you are never the same.  I am weeping with you.  I am praying for you.  I hope you feel me wrapping my loving arms around you.  

More importantly. God is there for you.  God sees you.  He hears you.  In fact,  2 Corinthians says it this way:

"Father of all mercy!  God of all healing counsel!  He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God  was there for us."  the Message

And Hebrews 6:18-20 describes it this way: "We who have run for our very lives to God have every reason to grab the promised hope with both hands and never let go.  It's an unbreakable spiritual lifeline, reaching past all appearances right to the very presence of God."  the Message

If you are unable to see or grasp ahold of hope, just know that I am willing to grasp it for you and hold on until you can reach and grab it on your own.  Not only am I there, more importantly God is there.  Right alongside you.  There is no pain to ugly, to deep, to harsh for him.  I am encouraging you to grab on to hope, even if it's the size of a small sapling of belief starting in your heart. 

My challenge today is this, if you are going through hard times, hold onto hope.  

And if you are not going through a hard time, then team up with someone who is. Be the supportive "Southern Pine" by growing beside them and hold them up by intwining your roots along side theirs so that they have the support needed to not fall over. Be the rare "Oak Tree" who springs up in the unlikely place of someone else's pain and give them a shady spot to rest under your prolific leaves.  I am telling you that this kind of love is rarely found in our world today. Help them hold onto hope.  Show up.  Be present.  Listen. Wrap them in lots of love.  Be gentle with your words, in fact, use as few words as possible, and make sure to pick words that are supportive and loving.  Pray for them and with them.  Always pointing with your actions towards the source of Hope-- God.    

The Hard Questions in Life ... or Lessons from a man named Job

I have tried to teach my son to ask questions.  My goal has been to get him to think critically.  To use his brain.  To not aimlessly go along with something just because someone says you should.  To gain understanding of not only what he believes to be true, but the why of it.  To dig deep and find answers.

And, although I still subscribe to that teaching method, there's another part of the lesson that is harder, harsher to learn.  The second part of this question and discovery method is that there are sometimes questions in life that are harder to answer.  There are either no clear cut answers to these questions, or the answers are extremely complex.

My son has recently been asking some of these harder, more complex questions lately in his struggle to truly understand his beliefs, his faith, and his purpose in this world.  Questions like if God is really good, and wants good things for us, then why do people who believe in God suffer?  Why doesn't God heal everyone?  Why do children die?  Why does disaster strike?  Why doesn't God immediately take away my pain?  And, my heart breaks a little bit for him as he struggles with these questions, because it means that he's lost a little bit of his innocence about life.  He's beginning to understand that life carries with it joy, but also sorrow and pain.  And I know intellectually that this has to happen, this struggle.  These questions are part of growing up.  But still, a small part of my heart is grieved, because no longer are the answers easy or clear cut. No longer is belief easy.

And as I struggled with trying to at least come up with some kind of answer to these hard questions, I turned to the Bible, specifically the book of Job, looking for some kind of answer.  I'll be honest here, I have a love/hate relationship with this story.  On one hand, I love Job's initial response upon learning that he had lost everything:

"Then he (Job) fell to the ground in worship and said, Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart.  The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised."  Job 1:21

And yet, this story sometimes terrifies me with the thought that God could allow this to happen to someone who was blameless and served God wholeheartedly.  I mean honestly, I'm no Job.  Not even close. And so, what would that mean for me?  I probably deserve some bad things to happen to me.  Gah!  This was truly one of the more terrifying Bible stories that I heard as a child.  And for that reason, I tend to skip over Job.  Trying to not read it at all.  Or, if I do read it, I only read the good parts, which, let's face it,  pretty much take place in the first and last chapter only.  Ummm yeah.

However, I do not believe that God is a God of chance.  I believe that the book of Job and his story are included in the Bible for a reason.  Could it be that there are real, applicable lessons to be learned there?  I found some lesson there when I went back and re-read the book of Job. And let me tell you, this is one of the hardest parts of the Bible for me to read.  Everything about me wants to reject and ignore this story.  It is my Christian version of Moby Dick (I had to read that horrid--to me-- book in High School and I obviously still carry some bitterness and scars--Whatever.).  A book to read once because I am supposed to, but then to sit it aside to collect dust, never to be touched or read again.  So, I'm going to share with you just a couple of the lessons I have learned/am learning from Job with the disclaimer that I am not a theologian (nor do I ever hope to be) and I'll be the first to admit that these lessons may in fact be meant just for little old me.

Job Lesson number one: How to treat a friend who is suffering.  

Job's three friends, Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar hear that their friend was in trouble, and their first instinct was to go to their friend and comfort him.  This is actually a good thing.  When someone you know is suffering-- one of the best things you can do is to just be there.  Oh, if only his three friends had just stopped with this one act-- they would probably be remembered as great friends of Job.

However, where they got off track was when they tried to explain the "why" of suffering.  You see, to them, there had to be a reason, a justification, as to why their friends life had suddenly turned so tragic.     I would say that this is probably a normal human response.  We seek answers.  We seek understanding.  We, as humans, are uncomfortable when there are no answers to be found.  We want things to be wrapped up in a neat little box.  We want to solve the great equation of X+Y= suffering.  

Sometimes there is an answer for X and for Y.  Sometimes we cause our own suffering through choices we have made.  Sometimes.  But not always.  In fact, most of the time it seems to me that some of the true suffering we see going on in this world has no answer.  Or, let me say it this way, there is no answer that we/I can wrap my human, very limited, brain around.

This was one of those times.  There wasn't an answer for the question of why Job was suffering.  Or at least, not a human answer.  And, in their uncomfortableness with the question of why, Job's friends sought out the only answer that they could understand-- the answer of deserved suffering.  Job was suffering because he did something to deserve it.  And so, they decided that they, in all their great human knowledge understood the situation and that it was their task to point out to Job his great need to take responsibility for his actions.  They tried to explain something that they truly didn't understand.  

And in that explanation, they mis-represented God.  They said things like God caused/allowed Job's children to die because of sin in their lives.  Because of sin in Job's life.  They said that God caused/allowed Job's sickness because of sin in his life.  That God caused/allowed the loss of his fortune because of sin in his life.  You see, neither of the three friends truly knew the behind the scenes story.  They had no knowledge of God's plan.  And yet, they presumed to know what was going on.

In their quest to answer the why question, they forgot about the true purpose of their visit.  They were supposed to go and comfort their friend.  That's it.  That simple.  You see, a friend who is there to comfort is there to listen, really listen to the one who is suffering.  They are there to help, inspire, cry with, pray with, and lift their friend up. 

Not once does it mention that his three friends prayed with Job.  Not once does it mention that his three friends did something to help ease his suffering by tending to his sore body.  Nope, they instead gave him speeches about what he should have done, and what he should do next.  Not once did they truly try to empathize or seek to truly understand Job's grieving process.  Instead they said things like:  Do you think you are the only one who suffers?  You need to get over it.  You brought this on yourself. And the ever so helpful, blessed is the man whom God corrects.  Such nice words of comfort.

So, lesson number one on how to treat a friend who is suffering is simple.  Be there.  Listen. Love.  Say something like this: "I'm so sorry.  This is really awful/terrible/hard/...I love you.  And I'm here to be with you through this."  Then shut up and show them God's love through caring, comforting actions.  Not through speeches.

Job Lesson number two:  There are some things that happen in this life that you cannot possibly understand because YOU ARE NOT GOD.  You are not meant to understand everything.

For me, I learn a lot about the complexities of God by observing nature.  I am just stunned at the way God makes things.  Interconnects things.  Stunningly.  Brilliantly.  And beyond my capacity to understand or explain.  I mean really, the thought that had to go into this complex eco-system where I live  just blows my mind.  Consider the mosquito.  Probably the most annoying bug on this planet called earth.  And yet, the lowly mosquito plays an important part in ecology.  You see, there are many species that depend upon the mosquito for food.  Ok, so what?  Well, would you believe that we, as humans depend on them for food as well?  Did you know that aside form causing irritating bites and spreading disease, mosquitos are also pollinators of plants?  I think we all understand why that is important.  How about the items we consume as food.  Let's take fish, for example.  We eat fish and a lot of fish eat mosquitoes.  To take it a step further, the mosquitoes provide nutrition for small fish, small fish provide nutrition for larger fish, and larger fish provide nutrition for us humans.  These are extremely easy and small examples, but they help somewhat explain the complexity that God placed into his design of this planet called earth.  

If God has placed that much thought into something as small as a mosquito, how much more thought has he placed into mankind and our lives.  I cannot even comprehend all the complexities that are built into life events.  We have all heard of the domino effect.  The term referring to how one persons reaction triggered another and so on and so on until an end result was achieved.  Now imagine this as applied to our lives.  Imagine this invisible domino trail repeated thousands and thousands of times for each individual person on this planet.  How do we track all of that?  The answer is, we don't.  We can't.  But God can and does.  

The point is this, there will be times in my life when I will not understand the "why" of things.  The answer is too complex for me.  I do not have the capacity to understand all the nuances.  I AM NOT GOD.  And you know what?  This lesson brings me comfort at times.  It's a relief to acknowledge that understanding is not what is always required of me. That's God's job.  Instead, I can let go of the "why" and simply state "I have faith in God, who has knowledge and understanding that exceeds my own, and who works to bring good."

So, while I am watching my son as he struggles with the why questions, my answer to him is often this.  I don't know the answer, but I know the one who does. I have a relationship with Him and I trust in Him.  I take comfort in His knowledge.  He knows the why of things.  He sees the thousands of domino trails.  

This is an answer, but not an easy one, especially when in the middle of the terrible storms of life.  I'll admit to times of questioning.  Times of doubt.  Times of frustration.  Times of heartbreak.  Times of brokenness.  Times of weariness.  Times of anger.  And yet, when life is harsh, and hard, and disappointing, I strive to lean not on my own understanding.  I am striving to lean instead on the one who holds the stars in his hands and commands the mornings.  And to be the friend who brings comfort to others, not noisy, loud, ignorant speeches. 

Unforced Rhythms of Grace....

"Unforced Rhythms of Grace."  This phrase just struck me last week when I read the following scripture:

"Are you tired?  Worn out?  Burned out on religion? Come to me.  Get away with me and you'll recover your life.  I'll show you how to take a real rest.  Walk with me and work with me--watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Matthew 11:28-30  the Message

That one line reminded me about the nature of God.  What I sometimes forget about His nature.  God's nature is one of gracious gift giving.  That's truly what grace is.  Grace is the undeserved, unmerited, unearned favor of God.  Grace is God's exercise of love, kindness, and mercy  towards us.  Isaiah describes it this way:

"For the Lord longs to be gracious to you, therefore He will rise up to show you compassion for the Lord is a God of justice.  Blessed are all who wait for him."  Isaiah 30:18

So, how do I learn to recognize the unforced rhythms of grace in my life?  How do I learn to recognize these gifts from God?  I think that the first step is to actually build a relationship with God-- to truly learn His nature, how he works in my life.  

"God doesn't want a religious experience for me;  He wants a personal relationship with me."  

Rachel Wojo

"My life is a story about who God is and what He does in a human heart."

What is interesting about true relationships is that they can't be forced.  Both parties must desire the relationship in order for it to happen. Isaiah 30 talks about God's longing for relationship with you. And  in Matthew 11, God invites you to spend time with Him, to work with Him, to watch Him and learn. Both scriptures also describe a gentleness in the way that God approaches relationship with you.  A lesson that we all could learn from when seeking to introduce others to God.  God isn't looking to push Himself on you.  He is not starting the conversation with you in anger at your sin, pointing out all your failures.  It's quite the opposite.  He's longing to show you grace and compassion.  He wants you to live freely and lightly.  Read what God says in the Bible.  Talk with him.  Ask questions.  Wait for answers.

Sidebar:  Do you think, that just maybe, this could be an instruction manual on how we, as Christ-followers, should approach those who do not yet have a relationship with God?  I wonder how much more effective we would be if we approached with love and grace instead of reproach.  If we started out showing others unforced grace, instead of forceful judgement.  Hmmmm.  Ok, now back to our regularly scheduled program.

"He sees us here, and is waiting for this one mess of a moment to be the one in which we see Him." 

"Every Bitter Thing is Sweet" by Sarah Hagerty

"God is always doing 10,000 things in your life and you may be aware of three of them."  John Piper

"All I have seen teaches me to trust the creator for all I have not seen."  Ralph Waldo Emerson

The second step in the process of learning the unforced rhythms of grace is to adjust our vision.  To begin to really look for the gifts of grace that God gives us everyday.  This involves discipline on our part.  Our brains seem to be hard-wired to remember and recognize more of the bad than the good.  I don't know why this is so.  I believe there is a study out there that states that it takes two complements to balance out a negative comment.  You need to get ahold of your thoughts.  You need to force yourself to think about the good things that happen.  The surprising thing is that you often find that the good far outweighs the bad, you just don't seem to recognize this fact unless you put forth the effort to do so.

 It involves faith.  And here is where your relationship with God helps you.  If you have a relationship with God, then you know that He wants good for you.  You can trust that He loves you, even if it feels like He doesn't.  A true relationship doesn't rely on feelings.  A true relationship is built on the past actions of the other person.  Having proof that in the past, everything God has done for you has been for your good.  You have faith in the belief that God is for you.

The third step towards learning about the unforced rhythms of grace is interesting.  You will find that this last step will one day become your first step, as your relationship with God grows.  This last step involves gratitude.  Being grateful for all that God has done, is doing, and will do.  There is something powerful in gratitude.  Gratitude frees you.  Gratitude lightens you.  When you begin to recognize and acknowledge God's grace in your life, the heavy burdens of worry, regret, guilt, shame, tiredness, bitterness, resentment, fear, and sorrow begin to lift off of you.  You will indeed, recover your life.

"I do not at all understand they mystery of grace--only that it meets us where we are but does not leave us where it found us."  Lamott

So, my challenge to myself and to you is to learn the unforced rhythms of grace that are at work in your life.  Rest in them.  Savor them.  Rejoice in them.  

"The grace God offers is not only for saving you from this world, but also for carrying you through it."

Rachel Wojo

If you do not know this God of grace I am talking about, why don't you introduce yourself?  It's as simple as just talking to him and saying hello. Reaching out to start a conversation with him.  I promise you,  He's already met you more than halfway.  All you have to simply do is hold out your hand.  He will meet you where you are with love, compassion and grace.

I'll leave you with this verse and a few photo's of the sun shining bright through the trees and onto the flowers.

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his far toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6: 24-26

A Blessed Walk in the Woods...Be Encouraged

"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them.  The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.  A righteous man may have many troubles but the Lord delivers him from them all;  he protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken."  Psalm 34:17-20

I've been listening to the stories of those around me.  The heartbreaking, gut-wrenching stories of life that those I come into contact with share with great courage and great pain.  And I'll be the first to admit that I do not have all the answers for the hard questions you have.  Questions about why, and how, and when, and how long.  But I do know the one who does.

Do you need encouragement today?  Well, I'm going to ask you to join me for a different kind of blog. I'm going to ask you to join me as I take a walk through the woods around my house and read a few scriptures of encouragement and blessing.  Have hope!  God is for you!

"The Lord bless and keep you; The Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;  the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace."  Numbers 6:24-25

"For the Lord is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless."  Psalm 84:11

"But blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.  He will be like a tree planted by the water that sends its roots by the stream.  It does not fear when heat comes;  its leaves are always green.  It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit."  Jeremiah 17:7-8

"The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;  but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles;  they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint."  Isaiah 40: 28-31

"Are you tired?  Worn out?  Burned out on religion?  Come to me.  Get away with me and you'll recover your life.  I'll show you how to take a real rest.  Walk with me and work with me --watch how I do it.  Learn the unforced rhythms of grace.  I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you.  Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."  Matthew 11:28-30  the Message

"May the Lord answer you when you are in distress;  may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.  May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.  May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings.  May he give you the desires of your heart and make all your plans succeed.  Now I know that the Lord saves his anointed;  he answers him from his holy heaven with the saving power of his right hand."  Psalm 20:1-4, 6

"Oh, that you would bless me and enlarge my territory!  Let your hand be with me, and keep me from harm so that I will be free from pain."  1 Chronicles 4:10

"I sought the Lord, and he answered me;  he delivered me from all my fears.  Those who look to him are radiant;  their faces are never covered with shame.  This poor man called, and the Lord heard him;  he saved him out of all his troubles.  The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.  Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.  Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing."  Psalm 34:4-8, 10

"Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this, says the Lord Almighty, and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it."  Malachi 3:10

"Be strong and courageous.  Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you;  he will never leave you nor forsake you.  The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you;  he will never leave you nor forsake you.  Do not be afraid;  do not be discouraged."  Deuteronomy 31: 6 & 8

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."  

Philippians 4:19

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,  though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.  There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells.  God is within her, she will not fall;  God will help her at break of day.  Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts. The Lord Almighty is with us;  the God of Jacob is our fortress."  Psalm 46: 1-7

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus."  Romans 8:38-39

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you."  Jeremiah 29:11-14

"The righteous will flourish like a palm tree,  they will grow like a cedar of Lebanon;  planted in the house of the Lord, they will flourish in the courts of our God.  They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green, proclaiming, 'The Lord is upright;  he is my rock, and there is no wickedness in him."  Psalm 92:13-15

"You give abundant showers, O God;  you refreshed your weary inheritance. " Psalm 68:9

"Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens."  Psalm 68:19  

"The Lord redeems his servants;  no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him."  Psalm 34:22

I hope this "virtual" walk has left you feeling encouraged.  I'll leave you with one more word of encouragement today.

"Praise the Lord, O my soul;  all my inmost being praise his holy name.  Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits---who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,  who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagles. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.  He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:  The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.  He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;  he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.  For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;  as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.  As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;  for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust. "  Psalm 103:1-14

1000 Things to be Grateful For… or Why Gratitude Matters

"Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world."  Sarah Breathnach

Yup, you guessed it.  I have read yet another book that has inspired me.  This time it is "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp.  This beautifully written book follows her personal quest to find the key to the fullness of living.  It's a fantastic read and I encourage you to do so! During her journey, a friend challenges her to come up with a list of 1000 Gifts or things to be grateful for.  And this is where I picked up the title for this blog.

Hmmm… a list of 1000 things to be grateful for doesn't sound like that hard of a thing to come up with, until you actually try to do it.  You see, I think we can all readily come up with maybe 50 or more "big" things to be grateful for.  Things like I am grateful that I have a home to sleep in.  Stuff like that.  But, if you only look for and list the "big" items, it may take you several months, if not years to get to the 1000 mark.

And let's be honest, we have a bad habit of looking and focusing more on the "Big" bad things that are happening all around us.  I would venture to guess that we would have an easier time coming up with 1000 things that are unsatisfactory, unacceptable, deficient, and harmful in our lives and world.   All you would have to do to jot down that list would be to listened to the news, read the paper, or even peruse Facebook for one hour and your list would be fairly long.

And don't get me wrong, I'm not recommending the "put your head in the sand" approach to life.  We can't just ignore the "bad" stuff happening all around us.  However, I believe some of what is wrong with us has to do with our unwillingness to stop and recognize the gifts that God does endow upon us in everyday life.

"Gratitude for the seemingly insignificant -- a seed --this plants the giant miracle.  The miracle of eucharisteo, like the last supper, is in the eating of crumbs, the swallowing down one mouthful.  Do not disdain the small.  The whole of life -- even the hard -- is made up of minute parts, and if I miss the infinitesimals, I miss the whole."  Ann Voskamp

"Th art of being happy lies in the power of extracting happiness from common things."  Henry Beecher

"Something always comes to fill the empty places.  And when I give thanks for the seemingly microscopic, I make a place for God to grow within me.  This, this, makes me full."  Ann Voskamp

"For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.  I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.  I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want."  Philippians 4:11 & 12

"A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work.  This too, I see, is from the hand of God."  Ecclesiastes 2: 24

So, the challenge to find 1000 things to be grateful for requires you to examine your life differently.  It requires you to look, really look, and be present in your day to day life.  This takes practice.  And, it may feel very awkward at first.  You see, we have gotten out of the habit of feeling wonder.  I'm not as eloquent in my descriptions as Ann Voskamp is but I'll share with you a few of my 1000 things  to be grateful for from my own personal list to help describe to you what this looks like.

1. The flickering on and off of the lightening bugs at night, creating a natural sort of "Christmas in July" feeling in the woods around my house.

2. Spiderwebs covered in dew on foggy mornings, just as the sun, that is desperately trying to break through the fog, hits them and lights up the small drops of moisture so that they sparkle like a million little diamonds strung across the branches.

3. The way my sons big, almost full-grown man hands,  now wrap around mine when we pray food blessings at dinner time.

4. The way my husbands eyes crinkle in the corners when he smiles at me.

You see, it really is the small things.  Oh, but what a big shift it causes in my whole day, this gratitude and acknowledgement of these small gifts from God.  These small prayers of thanksgiving make everything easier to bear.  I can bear the hard stuff, knowing that there is also good stuff happening all around me.  We need balance.  We need to be able to see the balance.  It is not good to be shifted all the way to one side or the other.  If you cannot see both the good and the bad you tend to be immobilized, unable to move.  If you see only the bad, you do not see the hope that is out there.  Hopelessness keeps us unbalanced.  Hopelessness tells us that there is no good, no mercy, no love from our God,  Hopelessness makes doubt the center of our thinking.  We may believe there is a  God, but we have no faith in his love for us.  

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4: 6 & 7 NIV

"Don't fret or worry.  Instead of worrying, pray.  Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns.  Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down.  It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life."  Philippians 4: 6 & 7, the message

"Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious -- the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not to curse."  Philippians 4:8, the Message

"The real problem of life--in my life-- is lack of thanksgiving.  Thanksgiving creates abundance; and the miracle of multiplying happens when I give thanks--take just the one loaf, say it is enough, and give thanks--- and He miraculously makes it more than enough."  Ann Voskamp

In case you haven't already figured it out, nothing about us, as human beings, surprises God.  He knew that we would sometimes loose our balance.  That we would go off the track and run smack dab into the mountain of trouble that is out there in the world.  That we would forget to look for him in the everyday living of our lives. That's what Philippians 4 is all about.  It's all about how to find the balance we need in life.

God is not unaware.  He sends whispered "I love you" messages  to you through everyday, mundane, experiences.  Are you listening for them?  Or are you letting the shouts of all that is unsatisfactory around you drown them out?

So, really, besides us "feeling good" about the gifts that God gives, why does gratitude matter?  Here's why I think it matters.  In John it is stated that "they will know we are Christians by our love" and in Matthew that we are commanded to "Love they neighbor." However, have you ever tried to share  love when you don't feel loved?  Let me give you a hint-- you can't.  Not effectively.  Not in a way that draws people.

Gratitude is acknowledging God's love for you.  It is accepting the fact that God loves you so much that he is willing to give you better, more,  than what you deserve.  God's love is about abundance-- and I'm not talking about material abundance-- I'm talking about full-life abundance.  Abundance of joy, peace, and love.  So much abundance that it creates an overflow that you can't contain.  That you overflow with so much love, and joy, and peace that it can't help but spill out on those around you.  And then, others will be attracted to this God given abundance that is spilling out of your life.

And that, in my opinion, is the true secret gift of gratitude.  That is why gratitude matters.

If you are struggling to see or feel God's love for you, I encourage you today to begin your own list.  Retrain your eyes.  Form a habit of daily gratitude.  And believe me when I say, that even when things are hard, God's love is still there, waiting for you to discover it, in small daily whispered gifts.

I'll leave you with a few photos of simple gifts.  Have a great day!

Shut up and Listen

I have been reading some amazing books lately written by some just outright amazing women.  Women  who inspire me, challenge me, and encourage me.  They have all been thought provoking, but there is one that stands out to me right now.  It is a book entitled "Speak: How Your Story Can Change the World" by Nish Weiseth.

The premise is that sharing your story, even if it is a story of struggle, can be a powerful way to form meaningful relationship.  I encourage you to read it.  It is honest, and real, and sometimes gritty, and yet powerfully truthful.  It has challenged me to be straight up honest and truthful about my whole life, the messiness of it all, the goodness of it all, the painful, and the glorious.

But while the book has encouraged me to be bolder in telling my own story, in living my own life, that's not the most important lesson it taught me.  This book taught me the importance of silence.  It enforced the idea of shutting up and listening to others around me.  To really shut my pie hole (as the teenagers around me would say), and just listen.  Listen without judgement.  Listen without breaking in to give advice.  Listen without trying to fix the problem or find an easy solution.  To shut up!

And guess what?  This summer I have heard the most extraordinary, heartbreaking, amazing, and truthful stories from those around me.  Stories that I would have never known if I hadn't kept my mouth shut and just listened.  Stories that people often don't share.  I have cried with a fellow mom when she shared with me the problems she is having with her child, whom she had to send away, in order for that child to get the help that they needed.  Her story is full of guilt, pain, suffering, doubt, and feelings of failure and shame.  It is a story full of feeling rejected and judged as a mother, fear for her family and the impact of these decisions, hurt, and yes, even anger.  And yet, as this story has been unfolding in her life, I was going along, blissfully unaware of the trauma going on in that family.  All because I hadn't been bothered to sit down and make time to listen to her story.

I have listened as a young teenage girl has shared her story of  struggle with feeling love and acceptance from others, including family members, and including me.  Ouch!  Let me tell you, that was a painful thing to hear and understand.  And I would have gone on, unaware of this, if I hadn't taken the time to sit down and really listen to her story-- without prejudging what she was saying.  I had to sit down and be willing to listen without being defensive, setting aside my inclination to tear holes in  (what I perceive to be) inaccuracies in her story.  You see, to truly listen to her story I had to shed my perceptions and listen instead to how she perceived things, right or wrong.

There are too many stories to list in one blog.  But let me tell you this:  I have learned more from being silent and just listening, than I ever have from voicing my opinion and my action plan to solve the problem.

I will in all honesty tell you this is a hard thing to do, this listening thing.  You will want to judge.  You will want to solve the problem.  You will want to not even hear the whole story because sometimes it is just too painful. You will want to share your own version of this story.  You will want to defend your actions. You will want to point out all the ways in which this person is wrong.  You will want to interrupt.  You will, at times want to do anything but listen. I'm telling to listen anyway.  Shut your pie hole.  Put your hand over your mouth. Button your lip.  Zip your lips. Bite your tongue.

And listen with the intent of making a truthful connection.  Listen with the intent of gaining understanding.  Listen when it's hard.  Listen when it's easy.  Listen.

I promise you that you will not walk away the same person.  There will be a change.  You will often feel more compassion.  You will gain understanding.  You will gain connection.

And then, and only then, if it's appropriate, you may speak.  But make sure you are speaking with understanding.  Make sure you are speaking with compassion.

One of my favorite sounds in all the world is the sound of whales when they expel air while coming up to the surface of the water to take a breath.  Especially when the water is quiet and that is all you hear, their loud, long exhale.  I'll leave you with a photo of such an experience with a Humpback whale in Alaska.

A Change in Direction… Now Go North

"You've circled these hills long enough; now turn north."  Deuteronomy 2:2

Fall is here.  A change of season.  Facebook is filled with people talking about all the changes taking place in nature.  Some of us are excited for the change.  Some of us, not so much.  But, change is going to happen regardless of how we feel about it.

The above scripture caught my eye the other day as I was thinking about the changes happening around me.  I don't know about you, but I don't always look forward to change.  Change is sometimes hard.  It often requires me to leave my comfort zone.  Sometimes change requires me to head off in a new direction-- out into the unknown.

That's what was happening to the Israelites in this verse.  They had been wandering around in circles for 40 years.  40 years!  That's a long time.  Certainly long enough to get comfortable in the pattern of wandering.  I'm not saying that their wandering life was easy, but often times we are more comfortable with the known than the unknown.  So, we become somewhat content in wandering around in circles, taking in the same view, day after day.

So now, we've come to the direction in this verse-- "You have circled these hills long enough."  Maybe that is where you find yourself today.  You have gone round and round, circling the same mountain over and over again.  Maybe you have even heard God whisper, "Go north."  But instead of heading off, you find yourself at a standstill, worrying about taking that next step.  Afraid to even point one toe in a new direction.

It doesn't clearly state in the Bible whether or not the Israelites were afraid of this new direction, but I would imagine that they were.  This was new territory.  This land held the unknown.  I'm sure they worried about how this new movement north was going to affect them.  Would the people who lived in the land that they were about to cross accept them peacefully moving through their land?  What would those people think?  What day to day changes would this movement require of them?  Would they be able to do things the same way?  Or would they have to change how they carried out their day to day activities.  Can they do what God asked?  Or where they going to screw things up again?  Doubts.  Fear.  Worry.

"The Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands.  He has watched over your journey through this vast desert.  Those forty years the Lord your God has been with you, and you have not lacked anything."  Deuteronomy 2:7

You see, God understood that there were probably many who had doubts, worry, and fear about this new direction, and this was his response.

So, if today you are finding yourself being asked to step out in a new direction, remember this:  God has been with you so far.  He has given you provision.  He has blessed you.  So don't be afraid to head North.  He will go before you.  He will walk beside you.  He will provide for you.  Don't miss the great and new opportunity that lies to the north because you are afraid of the unknown.

"But be assured today that the Lord your God is the one who goes across ahead of you like a devouring fire."  Deuteronomy 9:3

For me, 2014 has been a year of being challenged to be bolder in sharing God's love with those I come into contact with.  And while being bold, to be more loving in the way that I approach people.  I am being challenged to leave aside judgements and to just reach out in love.  To sit down and discuss topics in a loving way, not a judgmental way.  To be open to people whose ideas, thoughts, and beliefs differ vastly from mine.  To be willing to humble myself enough to learn from them and show them love in spite of what anyone else thinks.  To welcome honest dialog with those who may question my beliefs.  To be secure enough in the knowledge of who God is that I do not find these questions personally offensive.  To instead respond to them with God's love.  To take big, giant steps towards loving people in the way that Jesus loves them.

Man, oh man,  this process of heading north is sometimes hard.  The terrain is different and I find myself stumbling, not as sure footed as I use to be.  But, even when I stumble, God is there to pick me up, dust me off, and point me north.  My prayer for you is that you have the courage to "Now turn north," knowing that God is going before you, directing your paths.

I'll leave you with a few more photos of Alaska, simply because, for some unknown reason, I had that stupid song line "North, to Alaska" stuck in my head alllllll summer long.  Nothing else, just that one line in the song.  In fact, I can't even recall the rest of the song.  Whatever.