Which brings me to the topic at hand. We have been participating in an unholy number of "University Campus Tours" as of late and I began to notice a theme in all the endless propaganda of why said son should pick this school and why we, as parents, should pay for it. Almost all the Universities we have visited mention some form of "leadership" program. I'm talking above and beyond the usual student government opportunities. It seems to me that this (along with service programs) has become the new, "it" program throughout the nation. And, I think these leadership programs are a good idea, in general.
We visited High Point University last week and they have probably one of the most comprehensive "leadership" programs I have ever seen. Now, they don't necessarily call it by that name, but a rose by any other name is still a rose. The University is led by their very charismatic president, Dr. Nido Qubein, who believes strongly in building character alongside of knowledge. He believes in this concept so much that all Freshman are required to take series of courses with Dr. Quebein entitled the "Presidents Seminar of Life Skills," where students will be taught the fundamentals of leadership, the art of goal setting, time management skills, effective communication skills, fundamentals of fiscal literacy, the principles of stewardship, and etiquette and protocol. Each incoming freshman is assigned a Freshman Success Coach who helps them with Academic Advising and serves as a Liaison between freshman and other university staff. Freshmen are also teamed up with a student who will help them find and participate in activities that interest them. The culmination of this program is the "Presidents's Seminar for Seniors", which focuses on how to transition into the corporate world. It is truly one the most extraordinary programs I've ever witnessed.
Which made me think about Leadership, and what people know and don't know about it. And believe me, I'm not an expert on leadership, but there are a few things that I have learned over the years. These are a few key elements about leadership that I wish to pass down to my son.
1. A title doesn't make you a leader. A person with a "leadership" title isn't a leader unless people are willing to follow him/her. To be a true leader, and an effective leader, you must have someone to lead. If you ever find yourself with a leadership title and no followers, something is wrong, and needs to be fixed.
2. A true leader never asks his or her followers to do something that they are unwilling to do themselves. In fact, a good leader will lead by example, being willing to pitch in and do the work alongside everyone else.
3. Respect is earned, it doesn't automatically come with a leadership title. You earn respect by showing respect to others.
4. A good leader will listen to criticism. It doesn't mean that the leader will accept the criticism as true, or even change their approach, but a true leader should always be willing to weigh whether or not the criticism is merited and requires change.
5. All leaders are at some point the object of gossip, criticism, and hard feelings. Being a leader means that sometimes you have to make hard, unpopular decisions. If you cannot handle people talking about you, you may not be cut out for leadership.
6. Leadership often requires you to go above and beyond what is simply required. I know a lot of people who want the "leadership title" and the perceived perks, but want none of the responsibility or hard work. Here's a hard truth about being a leader. Most leaders do not get paid overtime when they work more than the required 9-5. My husband has a leadership title, and he is often the first one in the office and the last one to leave. He has to travel often. He sometimes misses our child's school events, fun family activities, etc... He is technically "on call" 24/7. He gets work related phone calls during vacations, school events, dinner, and other non-work related activities. In fact, a couple of years ago, we were in Venice, riding in a Gondola down the Grand Canal (which is probably one of the most romantic things you can do), when he received and had to answer a work phone call. Seriously, there we were, in the most romantic place on earth, and I'm just sitting there, listening to his conversation with one of his employees. There are many evenings when he sits down and catches up on work email in the evenings after we have had dinner. It's part of the deal, and he loves his job, but it does require some sacrifice.
7. It takes time, effort, and training to earn the title of leader. My husband knew that in order for him to have the career he wanted, he needed to be trained. He went to college, and earned his degree. He worked several part time jobs during the school season and then worked construction jobs during the summer in order to pay for college. He looked for people to mentor him (and still does) while working his way up. He also looked for opportunities to gain leadership experience by volunteering to work on projects outside of and beyond the duties assigned to him in his job description. My husband has put in 26 years of hard work to earn his title. He worked his way up. This took some time. He was not given his current title and position straight out of college.
8. A good leader recognizes the need for a good team and accepts the responsibility of having employees. A great leader recognizes and honors the responsibility that a leader has towards providing his/her employees with opportunities, training, and a quality work environment. All great leaders recognize that leadership isn't about them, it's about others.
9. A great leader leads by example. She/He should practice all the qualities and characteristics that she/he expects from their employees. Things such as integrity, honesty, loyalty, and respect.
10. A truly great leader is grateful. They are grateful for the opportunities awarded them in life, they are grateful for their employees. They are humble and willing to admit to mistakes. They are also willing to learn from their mistakes and do better next time.
Finally. Not everyone is cut out for leadership. If you are not willing to assume some of the sacrifice and hard work it takes to be in a leadership position, that's ok. Leadership is hard. Leadership often requires a high level of responsibility. Your worth, value and contribution to this world is not measured on whether or not you are a leader. But, if you do decide to take on a leadership role, do so with the full knowledge of what leadership entails, and with a willingness to accept the great responsibility that comes with leadership.
I'll leave you with a photo of my son. I can't believe that college is already knocking on our doorstep. But I am excited! This is what we have worked so hard for, to launch him out into the world to become someone who contributes to the world in a positive way. I'm very proud of him. To quote Dr. Seuss, "Oh, the places he will go..."
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